Revelations at 1 in the morning

I think I've come to the second biggest revelation of this relationship (hmm maybe 3rd): I don't think he finds me attractive anymore. I've been asking myself why our sex life sucks so much, why he doesn't kiss me as much as he used to, and tonight when he bluntly stated "Go get it somewhere else" after I asked why he doesn't like having sex anymore, it hit me like a ton of bricks. I always thought it was odd he was attracted to me, but I also thought that was just the self-deprecation talking. Now I guess I have a self-fulfilling prophecy. As he so harshly stated, I'm not going to go get it somewhere else. I guess it's back to my old asexual self until either he's attracted again (which I doubt) or we break up and I find someone else. God I swear my luck gets shittier every freaking year. Or maybe life is just telling me it's time to get out of this relationship. I keep getting signs but I'm still here. There are so many random little things preventing me from leaving, and yet I could probably talk down all of them. I guess I just wish things had worked out in a better fashion. All his words of last week mean naught when I'm not who he wants (in this case physically) and there's no way I ever could be. C'est la vie. Or maybe just as poetical: que sera, sera.